According to the Express the EU is coming for our kettles – and may have their sights set on our toasters too.
As the Express seeks to firm up support for a Brexit vote in June, the paper obviously thinks this is the kind of horror story that will get the old folk of Britain running to the polling station screaming "BACK OFF BRUSSELS!".
Of course, the story is largely nonsense and keen-eyed readers may note this isn’t even the first time the Express has claimed the EU was coming for our kettles.
Back in 2014 the Express claimed the EU hot drinks police were on the march and targeting the tea drinkers of Britain, no doubt sending worried readers scuttling into their panic rooms with kettle in hand. Some may still be in there, boiling water, because they can.
However, it is worth noting "our kettles" have survived this threat once before and will do again.The EU may suggest the kettles we buy in the future should be more energy efficient and durable, but such a sensible suggestion is hardly the "assault on our way of life" the Express would like us to believe.
Running the pro-Brexit 'Leave' campaign has always looked like an uphill struggle. In the absence of credible arguments they have had to cobble together a campaign based on old lies, scaremongering and a handful of celebrity endorsements.
It seemed inevitable the pressure would tell and things took a strange twist on Wednesday when the Leave campaign issued a bizarrely-worded threat against ITV. This followed the broadcaster booking Nigel Farage - arguably the most established critic of the EU in British politics - to debate Brexit.
A statement from the Leave campaign, claims this is a secret plot by "The Establishment" (capitalisation their own) to freeze out their champions Boris Johnson and Michael Gove.
"The Establishment …[are] now fixing the debates to shut out the official campaign… ITV has lied to us in private while secretly stitching up a deal with Cameron to stop Boris Johnson or Michael Gove debating the issues properly. ITV has effectively joined the official IN campaign and there will be consequences for its future – the people in No.10 won’t be there for long."
It’s desperate stuff. Putting aside the ridiculous non-specific threat, 'team Boris' suggesting anybody else benefits from an unfair leg-up from the media shows a ludicrous lack of self-awareness. The same goes for their cries of "MEDIA BIAS!" given the open backing the Leave campaign has received from the likes of Rupert Murdoch, the Daily Mail and the Daily Express.
The statement from the Leave campaign also suggested political editor Robert Peston is actually running ITV and is abusing his authority to push a pro-EU agenda on the broadcaster.
Peston dismissed this as "a mad slur".
"We have tried everything we could but sadly we just haven't reached the sales figures we needed to make it work financially," she wrote.
The fact Trinity Mirror’s gamble in launching a print newspaper in 2016 has't paid off won't come as a surprise to many people. But the plug being pulled so quickly, after just 50 editions, does come as a surprise. Any new business venture takes a while to find its feet but clearly an impatient Trinity Mirror hadn’t seen enough in the first two months to convince it The New Day was worth further investment during challenging times for the company.
Ultimately, the paper, which drew unfavourable comparisons to the i and Metro during its short existence and clearly operated on a tight budget, never managed to be as bold or remarkable as the decision to launch it. However, Phillips' note on Facebook explains her clear and admirable belief that it was better to try and fail than not to try at all.
"To have not given this a go was to mean we were content to stand on the pavement and watch the decline of British national newspapers hurtle past us. But we weren't."