The Daily Star today claims on its front page to have got the scoop that every other media outlet is chasing - the identity of the next Doctor Who. The paper claims "Michael Jackson's daughter Paris has been lined up to be the next Doctor Who."
Well, I don't think any of us saw that coming. So who is it who has lined up Paris Jackson for this hotly contested role?
Let the Daily Star explain:
"The 15-year-old tweeted her job application to the BBC after becoming a massive fan... Schoolgirl Paris tweeted a snap of the Tardis, saying: "Omg I wanna be The Doctor..."
But it's not just Paris putting herself forward for the role. The Daily Star would never run a front page story based on such flimsy foundations. They've got another source:
"Yesterday she was flooded with support... Skater Girl tweeted: “OMFG PARIS I LOVE YOU FOR THIS THE DOCTOR!!!! YOU’LL BE THE 12th DOCTOR.”
Fair enough. If Skater Girl said so, it must be true. I happen to know she only tweets in all capitals when she's absolutely sure of something.